Thursday, August 29, 2013

College Move-In Week

Sean and I love living in a college town. There's plenty of art, culture, and smart people around, and there's always something to do. There's also the long, lazy summers, and the feeling of "having the place to ourselves" when the students are gone.

Now that school is starting back, there's an awesome feeling of excitement in the air.  Every college town needs this kind of energy-- the energy that comes from the new freshmen moving in, getting ready to make friends, reinvent themselves, and-- if given the opportunity--hit on their roommate's serendipitously hot older brother.

In all this excitement, it's easy to overlook the parents.  At least, it was easy to overlook them before we had a baby.  Earlier this week, Millie and I decided to increase Sean's love for us by bringing him a burrito at work (see also this article.) As we stood in line at the burrito place I noticed some eyes on us. Lots of eyes.  Eyes filling up with tears.

Ohhhhh! I get it.  It's the baby.  YOUR baby is going off to college, and you remember when he/she was the size of MY baby.  And now, you are so moved by that memory you are tearing up in the build-your-own burrito line. (Or, alternatively, you could be so moved by my Davinci-esque ability to dress a burrito with chipotle cream sauce that you are crying.) Either way, I understand.

Parents, I am so sorry to have caused you pain.  If it makes you feel any better, one day I too will be in your situation, and my heart will be ripped out by the sight of little babies too.  Then, it will be further ripped out over the next four years as I see my daughter only intermittently as her dirty laundry dictates, or when she needs to introduce me to some simpering young man whose name starts with a B-- like Blaine, or Blake, or Brett or something.... who I will loathe.

So, in preparation, I have decided to write a Millie a letter for when we move her off to College. Here's how it goes.

Dear Millie,

Your father and I are exhausted! How many more trips to do we need to make up these stairs?! Honestly, How many pairs of shoes can you possibly require?? In other news, we are SO STINKING PROUD OF YOU.  We know you are going to learn so much, and have so much fun at College.  Please don't tell us about the latter.  Seriously, the less we know the better. Incidentally, I saw you staring at your roommate's serendipitously hot older brother. He is way too old for you young lady! What did you say his name was? Brent...Brad...Brett? Wait a minute. Shit. 


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