Tuesday, March 24, 2015

The key to toddler birthday parties? Food coloring.

 I recently threw a birthday party for our beloved two-year old, Millie.  Millie is now two, which means she is a BIG GIRL, and has therefore grown weary of her diapers (which are for babies),  and in no way contain images of Elmo.  It also means that she was old enough to know about *birthday parties,* and specifically that at birthday parties, she and all her friends would be allowed to eat cake.

I can't prove it, but I'm pretty sure that a toddler's social status is directly correlated to the frosting intake at her birthday party, and certainly to the unnaturalness of her frosting colors. So, if a grown-up looks at a your child's birthday cake and thinks "there is no way this frosting color originated anywhere but in a beaker of toxic chemicals, " chances are you've just helped grow your child's social capital.

No taking any chances, I decided to make Millie these  birthday cupcakes:

I was going with the theme "googly eyes," which are-- in my daughter's estimation--- the finest representation of high art. These are probably more gelatin and food-dye than flour, but they looked majestic, and my daughter actually peed her pants when she saw them. 

If you are a parent wanting to recreate these, the components are simple. Just use oreos for the eyes, mini-chocolate chips for the nose, and chocolate cupcakes with dyed homemade buttercream frosting for the "frog body".  I used the neon colors of food dye to get that perfect "color that exists nowhere in nature" look. I mixed that in with the frosting and iced the cupcakes in a very inexpert fashion.

When Millie saw the cupcakes, I knew she felt like her party was something special. My only fear is that she'll be pooping food dye this week. This could present a problem, because she's really been enjoying the new, BIG GIRL, Elmo underwear we bought her for her birthday.

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