Thursday, May 16, 2013

5 Great Songs to Sing to Your Baby

Sean and I have always been  pretty musical couple.  We even played in a band back in NC, and I don't want to brag, but we got pretty big at one point---in the way that "big" can be interpreted to mean "had a lot of members." In addition to the usual lead guitar, lead singer, rhythm guitar, bass, and drums, we also had fiddle, cowbell, banjo, dobro, mandolin, and a clogging accordion player.  On a personal note, if you've never played in a band that had a clogging accordion player, I feel sorry for you. 

Our shows would get pretty fun, as our drunk friends fans were an especially raucous group.  For instance, there is no telling when someone would throw their panties on stage at our drummer, or when the bartender would have to announce in defeat "We are out. You have drank all the PBR."

With such a rich musical heritage, you can imagine how much music has become part of Millie's life too. I think it was my friend Sue who warned me, after the birth of her own baby, "you have no idea what a songwriting machine you are about to become." Boy, was she right. 

These days, Sean and I have split off from the band to work on a side project-- our daughter.  We're playing some pretty shitty venues, and by that I mean "her diaper changing table." We've come up with some sweet jams to entertain our tiny music critic (she is very judgmental of any songs that do not contain xylophone music,) and I thought I'd share a few of them with you today. I hope you enjoy them, preferably while selling your fridge out of PBR. 

To the tune of "This Land is Your Land" by Woody Guthrie

This boob is your boob,
This boob is my boob.
Our boobs got bigger,
Now we have side-boob!
From the left-side titty,
To the right side tiiiiiity.
This boob was made for you and me.

To the tune of "Yellow" by Coldplay.

Look at the stripe
Look how it turned to blue
that was Mommy's cue
That it was all yellow

Inside your dipe'
There wasn't baby poo
It was a different hue
and it was all yellow

I'm cleeaning up your baby butt
It's eeeeasier to wipe because,
you must have peed yourself twice
you must have peed yourself twice

To the tune of "Don't Ya" by the Pussy Cat Dolls.

Don't you wish your baby was sweet like me?
Don't you wish your baby had feet like me?
Don't ya?
Don't ya?

Don't you wish your baby could hold up her head?
Don't you wish your baby'd go the hell to bed?
Don't ya?
Don't ya?

To the tune of "Low Rider" by War.

All. My. Girls. Love a clean diaper.
The clean. Dia-per. Is a little drier
take a little piss
take a little piss
take a little piss and pee
take a little piss
take a little piss
take a little piss for me

To the tune of "Funky town"by Lipps Inc.

Won't you take me to, titty town?
Won't you take me to titty tooown.

Won't you take me to, titty town?
Won't you take me to titty tooown.


  1. This is fantastic! I can't wait to see you perform for others!:)

  2. That Sue is so smart. However, every song has to rhyme "cloggin" with "toboggan", otherwise I don't want to hear it. Have you & Sean come up with a name?

  3. Randy finds it a little disturbing that I constantly make up songs for Liam-- like it's growing up in a musical or something. I think he's just jealous that he didn't come up with "sleepy baby" himself:
    Sleepy baby, yeah yeah yeah
    Sleepy baby, wah wah wah
    Sleepy baby, wrapped up tight
    Sleepy baby, say goodnight
    I'm 100% certain that your made up songs are better than mine.

    1. Elizabeth, Sleepy Baby sounds killer. Randy is almost certainly just jealous.

    2. Jealous Randy, yeah yeah yeah
      Jealous Randy, wah wah wah